TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America.
MARIA: Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
CLASS: Maria.
>> >> __________________________________________
>> >>
TEACHER: Why are you late, Frank?
FRANK: Because of the sign...
TEACHER: What sign?
FRANK: the one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
>> >> _________________________________
>> >>
TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
>> >> _______________________________________________
>> >>
TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell "crocodile?"
GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L"
TEACHER: No, that's wrong
GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
>> >>______________________________________________ _
>> >>
TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.
>> >> ______________________________________________
>> >>
TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have to day that we didn't
have ten years ago.
WINNIE: Me!
__________________________________________________ _
TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
>> >> _____________________________________________
>> >>
TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with "I."
MILLIE: I is...
TEACHER: No, Millie..... Always say, "I am."
MILLIE: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
>> >>------------------------------------------------
>> >>
TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry
tree,
but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't
punish
him?
LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand.
>> >> __________________________________________________
>> >>
TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
>> >>________________________________________________ _
>> >>
TEACHER: Clyde, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as
your
brother's. Did you copy his?
CLYDE: It's the same dog.
>> >> __________________________________________________
>> >>
TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when
people
are no longer interested?
HAROLD: A teacher.